There was also a Lexx marathon last night, also viewers choice, but the episodes that were on were not necessarily ones I would have chosen myself. There are better ones. Which makes me wonder if there was actually a viewer's choice aspect to it at all. I don't remember seeing it advertised save the day before when there were a couple of "the votes are in, Lexx viewer's choice marathon blah blah" So I wonder if people voted at all, and they just picked the ones that got the best ratings over the seasons...? Who knows how tv really works except the little TV gnomes that run them.

My cat is in a McDonald's bag on the floor of my office. Maybe I should throw it away.

We had our first rehearsal yesterday for the film, just ran the script a few times, ran the scenes so we got the idea and to hear the dialogue, making sure it was ok. We changed a line here and there, just making it flow better within the scenes. It was fun. I met the boyfriend that I leave for the corpse, and I met the corpse that I leave my boyfriend for. Did I mention that I DO die? I get clubbed in a hallway? I think I already mentioned that.

I think I am just babbling, but it is 7am on a Monday morning that I have off because it's Queen Victoria Day, and being Canadian, we get a holiday on Queen's Birthdays. Bet you americans are sore you dumped her now! HAHA. Actually, I suppose you have Presidents day, but do you actually get that day off as a holiday?

I got a great scene in my acting class last night. It made me feel horrible. It's this woman who sees her boyfriend with another woman, instantly thinks he's cheating, and marches over to some guy's house and fucks him, then confronts her boyfriend, accuses him, tells him she slept with someone else. He then freaks out, says that the woman was a RING designer and that he was buying an engagement ring. then he leaves her. We did a cold read and MAN, I felt sick after. Can you imagine being in that situation?

YOu are in love. You are desparately insecure but you love so much. You see partner in coffee shop with someone else, some one VERY attractive, laughing, smiling, looking VERY happy and excited. You panic, you cry, you think, how long has this been going on? You stew and stew about it. You feel hurt, betrayed, lonely, devastated, desparate. You run to the person's house that has expressed interest in you previously. You cry a little on their shoulders, one thing to another and you fuck. You confront your partner, and discover that you fucked up. You fucked up BIG. All those emotions you felt when you saw them together were self generated. You imagined it, you imagined your betrayal, and you fucked up BIG. BIIIIG. You have just fucked up and lost the one person you loved with your whole heart because you wouldn't trust them, and you didn't respect them enough to ask them first before leaping to conclusions. Imagine THAT devastation. Imagine your stomach dropping out of your body, the floor falling away and the look on your partner's face because they know that you fucked someone else, you didn't trust them.

That's why I felt sick. It's horrible, it's destroying. I couldn't stop thinking about it after I got home last night. It was so horrible. What a great scene!! Nice meat.

No song of the day right now, because it's 7am and I can't play music in my house because I'll wake up Chris, who will be mightily upset to wake up to Catherine Wheel or some massive men's choir. Maybe later.

Word of the Day: (somewhat appropriate after the above description)

purblind PUR-blynd, adjective:

1. Having greatly reduced vision.

2. Lacking in insight or discernment.

Add to this that the work seems unsure of its audience, providing no footnotes or exact references, but concluding with a bizarre parade of bibliographical essays running to 59 pages; that it gives the date only about once every 100 pages (and then not always the right date...) and leaves us feeling as if we were wandering purblind in some deep cave.

--James R. Kincaid, "The Sum Of His Oddities," [1]New York Times,

January 13, 1991

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