I've just discovered that I have an audition today. It's for a Travel Show pilot. I am not looking goooood. I washed my hair last night, so it's clean, but it has that "I slept on this hair" appeal to it. I have on weird office clothes that I am not necessarily comfortable in.

They want me to do a monologue, talent, or story. I am not going to do a monologue, since a travel show is not acting. I think I'll tell a story. It might be a stupid story, but it'll be a story. I'll tell the one about when my little cat fell from the 7th floor of my apartment building and I was drunk and hysterical. That'll win em over fer sher! HA.

OR I could just sing something.

So it's another day at boring old work. I learned something great at acting class last night. I learned that it is actually possible to ground myself while I'm all freaky and nervous. I was freaky and nervous at the beginning of my scene and I realized after that we didn't actually focus beforehand so that may have had something to do with my energy being scattered all over the place. So Shea made me breathe and feel the floor and pull the energy up to my hips and I became really calm. I was a little jittery in the first two lines, but then I softened up and just mellowed and WOW it felt so nice to not be spazzing around the room.

I suspect that I made my scene partner nervous. He kinda panicked in the scene and pulled away and couldn't bring himself to connect with me. Either I intimidate him, or he's got some outside problems, which I'm sure he does because we ALL do, or maybe it was a result of not focusing in the beginning? I don't know. He got a minute verbal beating though, which he kinda needed, but it's never nice to hear your work was crap. I certainly hope that I never hear it. I'm sure I will, LOTS, but I don't want to.

Bleh.

I felt pretty horrible on Saturday night. I went through one of those moments where everything I try on is too stiff, too hot, too uncomfortable, and the stuff that is comfy, I felt fat, and bulgy and bloated. I went through a little bit of it on Sunday too, but felt better after I had gotten out of the house. I wonder why that is. I wonder if it's hormones mixed with hot air mixed with being self conscious about my appearance that does it to me. It's hard to turn all of that off once it really gets going. Well, I'll just have to keep at the working out, and just be a little more careful about my eating. I'll be fine then.

Hurrah for me!