Apr. 30, 2003 - 8:57 a.m.
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Ok so I wrote this whole big fucken entry yesterday and then accidentally clicked on something that was a link and it opened in the SAME browser window and wiped the whole fucken thing. So fuck.

So anyway, as I was saying, here is the Sex in the Suburbs question.

How do you picture your dream person? This can be your dream person to marry/date and/or your dream person to sleep with. You get the idea.

I tell you what. I'll just get uber picky and describe the most perfectest perfect guy I can possibly think of. Of course, he doesn't exist because technically, perfection doesn't exist, but it's nice to dream. Ok here goes:

Physical:

About 6 feet tall, around 160-175 pounds. I like 'em kinda slim and wiry. Not skinny, I like flesh, but kinda lean. I like that toned, muscled appeal with a little layer of fat over everything to make it soft and pliant. Gives me something to bite. I like a bit of body hair, but not that crinkly pube-ey stuff. The soft downy fuzz. Like the Lawyer's (sigh, he's close to perfect, but of course there are always flaws). A nice meaty bum, something to grab, and not all rock hard. I like the muscles to be underneath, where they can do their real work, like thrusting etc...hehe. But again, something squishy and pliant so I can bury my face in his bum cheek and bite bite bite.

Nice hands, nice feet, keeps his nails trimmed.

I like dark dark hair, but light brown is ok too. I'm not much into blonds. I like green eyes or dark dark brown ones. Plump lips, at least the lower lip, which is very very chewable. Soft skin, a little bit of scruff that's short enough to not be a beard, but long enough that it doesn't leave whisker burn on my chin.

Yes, the part we've all been waiting for...the COCK. Gotta be a good 8 inches. 7.5 will suffice, but I have a long vagina and my cervix is way the fuck in there. I wanna feel that banging. Girth is actually more important than length too, a nice fist-ful will do.

Wow, I'm running out of steam.

Personality:

He laughs a lot, and knows when to be silly and goofy, but has a dry sense of humour too, just to balance the silliness out. He can cry about the big stuff, but doesn't cry about everything, two people in a relationship that cry a lot is too many. He's got a sense of responsibility towards others, like his family, his girlfriend (meeee) but doesn't mind throwing some money away once in a while and being reckless. A happy medium. He's cuddly and affectionate and doesn't see my affections as clingy and annoying. He likes to kiss in public. He plays with my hair and strokes my skin and shaves my legs for me and massages me and all that crap.

But then there's the other side, the opposite animal monkey sex to the sarah mclachlan feely sex. the side of him where he throws me on the floor/bed/couch/kitchen counter/bathroom floor and rips my clothes off and then fucks me hard like he's going to split me in half. The whole hair pulling rutting grunting dirty messy sex thing kills me. I love it. All the slapping and slamming and sweating. SIGH.

A big deal: he has to want kids one day. Not now, not in the forefront, but one day, being a father is something he wants to do. I know I've talked about this before, and I've been contemplating life with no children, but for some reason, when I imagine never having them, things feel weird and unsettling and unhappy.

Bah, this has turned into a rant I think. All in all the perfect guy has it all, and then some. Too bad. It seems I have found one in all respects except one. No kids. Ever. He's even considered having the operation. That's pretty final.

old bitching - random - new bitching

Reads Like:

Sounds Like:
Sarah McLachlan - Shelter
Feels Like:
I'm in a relationship that will go nowhere but pleasure valley

1 fussbugets said...



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