On friday night, I got home about 2:30 or so, so I went to bed rather late as it was, and I ended up getting about 3 hours sleep because I had brutal anxiety dreams about being pregnant.

I actually think I am this time. You know women often say they just knew? I think I just know. I think it's possible I'm just being extremely paranoid. But I'm 4 days late on the period, which is nothing really, but I feel weird. I've felt weird all week. I think if anything, if I am pregnant, it was from late July that it happened.

I could very easily be flipping out for no reason, and the dreams could be a couple of things: 1) my body and subconscious mind saying, yep honey, you're pregnant, because of course your subconscious mind would know, since it knows all the shit going down in the body, 2) I'm just paranoid and it's manifesting in dreams, or 3) it has nothing to do with pregnancy that was just the form it took in my dreams and I just have general anxiety in my life.

Anyway. I'm going to buy a test this week, when I've got some extra money. I want to know for certain, and it's $10 that I'm sure I'm happy to spend for peace of mind.

So the question is, and maybe I shouldn't even think about this until I know what the answer to that test is, what would I do?

I can't even think about it. It's causing me more undue stress.

I'm not myself at all these days. I feel weird. I feel off. I feel like I'm all wrong. The things I say are wrong, the things I do are not normal. i don't know what's the matter with me. I'm scared to death.