I pretty much flipped out. I have spent all this time getting over him, and I have succeeded and now, he tells me I was right all along.

GRRAAAAARRRR. I don't know what to do. I said no. I offered my friendship. The lawyer is very uncomfortable with the idea. I don't know what I am going to do. I DO know that I do not want to pursue a relationship with Chris again. I am over him, I am not in love with him anymore. I'm also very stoked on the lawyer and want this to work out.

So. I guess nothing has really changed, just that Chris has become a new person, has realized his mistakes and will make someone else a very good boyfriend now.

I had a dream that I was caught in a river rapid flowing crazily and there was this man in there rescuing people. He rescued me, though he was in the water too, a homeless woman, who was very very thin and stupid, and an otter.

We all floated down the river together keeping each other afloat and it became this journey that we were on.

At one point he said, the otter is going to die, he has a rope around his neck and threw the otter into the rapids. I screamed "NOOO" because I knew that the otter was fine, there was nothing wrong with him, that the man just wanted to be rid of him. So essentially, he killed the otter.

We then floated a while further down the river and we pulled ourselves onto a rocky bank to rest. There was this crabbing cage thing that he was playing with and he put it over his head and was goofing around, when he put the homeless woman in it. I knew what he was going to do and I fled towards the river when I heard him crushing her. I could hear her bones cracking and things squirting and he was laughing.

I was crying and trying to get away and he swam after me and caught me. It was apparent that he just wanted me all along.

So we journeyed a bunch more and it came to light that he was in love with me. We came to some town with a drawbridge and a big deep river and up to this point I had been thinking of ways to get away from him. I thought of a house fire, where the firemen would come and I could get them to rescue me, or I could pull teeth and pretend to have died in the fire. (they'd find my teeth and look up my dental records).

So I turned to him and said, "Can we rent a house here? I want to stay here for a while."

He got excited and he found a job and we did that and I became all housewifey. The place was sunny, kinda like saskatoon in the summer and we had about 4 bathrooms, 6 bedrooms, a second floor and a third floor that was really just a landing of the stairs and a little alcove. Office I guess. We didn't use any of the upstairs rooms, we just used the first floor.

The bathrooms were filthy on the first floor and I was trying very hard to clean them. He would come home from work in a convertible red car with some old man and all these women in bikinis. So he was cheating on me too, though I didn't care because I was a prisoner.

I plotted my fire.

Then I woke up.