Jul. 07, 2004 - 12:58 p.m.
darkness takes it away, light gives it back and then some

Well, I did just that. Got up for work, got on the bus, and here I am, day half done.

But a new day, and light of day, brings back that little bit of perspective the dark of night can skew.

I got an email from Nonie this morning, completely unprompted, and it was just what I needed. Chris, her husband, woke up this morning and said "I don't want Arianna to be sad." I knew he saw me wiping tears when I got off the ferris wheel because he ran over and gave me a squeeze. In her email, Nonie gave me a peptalk, which didn't feel condescending at all, like Tromley's peptalks, and told me that she and Chris loved me and my energy and my beauty and my friendship.

Totally blew me away, that she knew somehow that I was having a very bad time last night and probably today too. That they both cared about me enough to wake up in the morning and wish that I wasn't sad. That woke me up a little myself. Reminded me that no, I'm not alone, even though it feels like it sometimes. That I'm important to people and that there is a place I fit in, at least in Chris and Nonie's lives.

That's worth an effort on my part, wouldn't you say?

I suppose if I were superficial and selfish and shallow, they'd know, and I wouldn't be counted among those they hold close.

I'm really, really fucking lucky.

old bitching - random - new bitching

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