I feel like crying. I�m so tired. All I want is to be happy, to make someone else happy, and to share that happiness all around. I know, that sounds really cheesy, but isn�t it really what we all want? To be happy? I�m tired of fighting for love. I�m tired of having to work through people�s outer shell bullshit to get to the soft, chewy centre.

I�m tired of having to defend my emotions and trivialize them, in case someone might think that I�m too intense and be scared away. My heart literally aches with this.

I feel a lump in my throat when I think of Jackrabbit doing all this fear shit. He wants me, I know it, he knows it, but he refuses to let it happen. He refuses to get close to me. He makes me feel like an asshole for being attached to him. I should have let him leave the morning he told me he was scared of becoming uninterested in my body in the long run. That would have saved so much trouble. I am in so much pain. Not because of Jackrabbit himself, but more the principle of it. This has happened to me my whole life. Maybe this time I should just stay down. Down for the count. Quit getting back up again, because when you get back up, you get walloped again, over and over. I�m getting a concussion, and this time, maybe I�ll just let myself sleep through the night.

You're skin, oh yeah you're skin and bone, turned into something beautiful.."