I make his life difficult. I confuse him. I demand too much of him, when he's only just a man. I want more than he can give me. I am the aggressor.

Yet I have done nothing but whatever he's asked me to. He pushes me away and then pulls me closer, only to push me away again.

He demands of me to be his friend, and to be there for him, and yet he caresses me and kisses my neck, slides off my panties, tells me he loves me, shows me he loves me. I think he asks too much of me. I'm just a woman, and I feel how I feel and I have to try to quell that and be something else. That's demanding a lot. Yet I've complied as best I can.

But I still get told to go away, and that he will give me nothing.

I do this again and again. It's vicious, my taste for destruction. Sometimes I think I seek it out. Other times I think that everyone is this way. There isn't a man alive that won't fuck with your head. It's unavoidable.

Everybody is fucked up. Side effect of higher intelligence. The smarter you are, the more fucked up. Look at geniuses. They're all crazy.