Oct. 29, 2003 - 10:19 a.m.
The entry that was supposed to happen in the previous entry
I find that I have a life these days. The week before I left for my holiday, I found a life. I brought friends I didn�t quite realize I had closer to me. I made new friends. It�s easy to forget sometimes that people do love you and do love to spend time with you, when you�re so busy being self-absorbed.
I need to make more efforts with my friends. I need to care more. I have this group of girls, for the first time in a long time, maybe since junior high. Beforehand, I had my girls, Christina, Karin and Anna. They were my girls. They still are. But they don�t spend time together unless I�m involved somehow. They�re from different aspects of my life. And they�re my oldest friends. But this new group of girls all come from working at the Arts Club. And I love them. All three of them are incredibly talented performers � they act, they sing, they dance, they�re funny. But here�s where the cool part comes in. They�re not �actors�. There is a stereotype involved with actresses and actors and that�s that they�re shallow, and fake and are friendly to people that can help them out, forward their career or something and otherwise, don�t bother. The difference is that Mia, Helen and Gouri are for real. We support each other; we hang out with each other. We are all in similar places in our lives. God I could go on.
So there�s one distraction.
More distractions: I feel that I�m moving into a place in my life where I am finally, more or less, the person I always wanted to be. I�m comfortable in my body, which I will never be completely satisfied with, because that�s our society and that�s my nature, but I am content. I know where I want to be and what I have to do to get there in my career.
Here�s where the �I got a life� comes into play. I have things to do on weekends. People invite me places. And I want to go! For someone who is so outgoing and gregarious, and extroverted, I can be very solitary and apathetic about making an effort to be with people. But now that the one thing that was taking up all my time, IE JR, has been removed, I have room in my life for so much more. I don�t give up doing other things to spend time with him. I do the other things. So doing one thing with someone causes them to invite you to other things and it goes from there.
I am looking forward to the rest of this week. Class tonight. Tomorrow, dinner with Tromley and to a play with the Girls II (G2 from now on) and Shirley and Trom and maybe Reverend Roddy Love and his girlfriend Holly. Friday night, only the biggest annual Halloween party ever to exist in the galaxy milky way. Saturday night, birthday party and BritBoy�s house where possibly Corny will be � who by the way, has not called me. Sunday, shooting the rest of this short film and Sunday night, a script reading. I�m out of control!!!!!
Incidentally, I wrote this in WORD, so that I couldn�t FUCK IT UP and lose the entry as is my usually modus operandi. Problem with this is that I end up writing ten pages of blather.
Enjoy!
old bitching - random - new bitching
Sounds Like:
Godley and Creme - Cry
Feels Like:
Cold feet
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What's Wrong With Alice?
last five entries:
Spell it out
Rehash
to keep her
End of the line
what to do, what to do.