Well, it's almost noon, the mail has not arrived. I'm starving and I want to pig out but can't. I think I'll just have soup and salad again. AGAIN. Sigh.

I experienced something really beautiful last night. It changed a lot of things in my mind, for the better. It answered a million questions I had. It made me want something more than anything in the world at that moment. And this morning, I feel the same. Things are better, things are good, things are great. I still have small fears and worries, I still have the bullshit, but it's not so loud anymore.