Well. I'm done work in 20 minutes for the week, and I am starting to feel really sick. This is not good. I feel chest-hurty and my head is achy and my throat is a little raw. I'm going to finish my left over past from dinner last night, then I'm going to do a little gardening and listen to the hockey game, then I am going to go to BED. Maybe rent some movies though, but otherwise?? BED. I have to work tomorrow morning at 10:00 at the theatre and I'm running early Sunday morning.

I am going to tell the Lawyer tonight that Jackrabbit knows about him. I don't know how, but I will have to. Sigh. I need to absolve myself of all this lying. At least my end of it. Once that's clear, then the road is clear for him to come clean and tell his friends about us, because it IS lying. It's not just omitting certain truths. It's outright bald faced.

It makes me sad, it makes our little wee relationship seem invalid in a way, like to the outside world, we don't exist, which I suppose isn't such a bad thing, but when the group of us hangs out, we can't touch each other, we can't admit that we've spent any time together. That's hard and that hurts me and makes me want to shake him, and tell everyone at the top of my lungs.

Sigh. More fucking drama. One day, my life may, MAY, be normal. Maybe. One day. Perhaps. Nahhhh.