Comments:

infrequency - 2003-10-31 20:03:56
after the book store, come to our party! it'll be huge.
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Distracted - 2003-11-01 01:15:18
Would that be such a good idea? I think you will find nostalgia, perhaps emptiness but closure seems unlikely.
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Distracted - 2003-11-01 01:17:54
I don't want to see you torture yourself. If you go through with it I wish you all the best.
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Arianna - 2003-11-01 14:14:55
I assume this means you won't be reading again?
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Distracted - 2003-11-02 01:18:36
Not at all, I like comming here. I mean exactly that "all the best" I wouldn't wish you all the worst.
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Distracted - 2003-11-03 23:07:10
You question has been bothering me. Is it not out of the ordinary for you to expect people to abandon you? I'll won't leave so quickly. Tell me love, why is my heart filled with pain and sadness when I read these things you write? I feel that though you may deny you are filled with so much pain. Your writing tells me that though you have come so far you still carry a heavy burden. Maybe I am reading something that is not there. Some days you write about things that make me think "Way to go Arianna, that's my girl" and then you write other things like this entry where you try to express your strength and disinterest but it is a thin veil over the truth. Everything you write about JR just exudes pain and misery. Maybe I am completely and totally mistaken.
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Arianna - 2003-11-04 12:02:34
No, it's not out of the ordinary. People go away all the time. Could be my fault, could be theirs, don't really know. Of course there's pain. There are days when I don't feel it as much and I feel like maybe I'm making progress, and then there are days where it's obvious I'm a mess and always will be. It's like a disease. Some days you just feel better, though it's still there. But I do feel better. Not entirely, but I don't cry anymore. That's HUGE for me because I cry very easily and freely. And it's not intentional. I just don't feel like crying. I still feel sad, but it's become more wistful sad and nostalgic sad and missing him sad, rather than anguished wailing or something. I am better. But like I said, the disease is still there, just maybe in remission a little?
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Arianna - 2003-11-04 12:03:22
Idea: why don't you create a hotmail address for me? Your identity won't be compromised that way.
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Distracted - 2003-11-04 13:32:52
I have created for you alone an email address at [email protected] I am tired now and need to nap. Ask anything you wish, tell me anything at all. Though I do not guarantee an answer. I will explain later why I need these terms.
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go on, foam at the mouth:

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